Metaphors are by nature misleading. That is why I use so many of them.

I got a haircut yesterday. If I didn't have facial hair, I would probably be taken as a somewhat suspicious member of society, as opposed to the Level Elmo threat to Mom, Money, and `merica I currently appear to be. At least that's the impression I've been given by the reactions of various security services operating in and around the District, US Customs being top of the list.

Hrmmm...what else?

I watched The Year of Living Dangerously the other night. Mel Gibson, Sigourney Weaver, 1983. It was eh. Okay at best. Fairly heavy-handed for my taste. People say things like: "I thought you were different. I thought you were a person of light!" Earnest plus hackney does not equal quality cinema in the Book of Chulius. Usually. Full frontal nudity makes everything better.

Everything.

Wouldn't it be funny if, right before Furious Jessy's water broke, Jackie for no reason whatsoever yelled at the top of his lungs "Look out! She's gonna blow!"? Maybe he'd be watching Blatz stand too close to an open flame with a bottle of high-octane aperitif in his hands, I dunno. I think it would be funny. Not, like, funniest thing ever funny, but kinda funny.

For anyone slow on the uptake, I'll spell it out for you: I am incredibly bored right now.

__________EVEN MORE!!!!!___________________________________

I think this is a more accurate version of the future than this.

God hates Florida. A lot.